NOT "Just Friends" Book Summary

Rebuilding Trust and Recovering Your Sanity After Infidelity

by Shirley Glass96

TL;DR

A comprehensive guide on understanding, preventing, and healing from infidelity, offering practical advice for rebuilding trust in relationships.

What is NOT "Just Friends" about

'NOT 'Just Friends'' by Shirley Glass explores the complexities of infidelity, providing a step-by-step guide from the initial suspicion to the healing process. Glass, a leading expert on infidelity, delves into how modern environments such as the workplace and the Internet can nurture dangerous intimacies. Through profound insights and practical advice, the book helps couples recognize red flags, prevent infidelity, and rebuild trust if betrayal occurs.

NOT "Just Friends" 6 Key Takeaways

Stages of Infidelity

Glass outlines the stages of infidelity, from initial suspicion and secretive behavior to full-blown affairs. Understanding these stages helps in early identification and intervention.

Emotional Affairs

The book emphasizes that emotional affairs can be just as damaging as physical ones, highlighting how emotional connections formed in innocuous settings can threaten marriages.

Red Flags

Glass identifies red flags such as increased secrecy, excessive time spent with 'friends,' and defensive behavior, which can indicate a partner is slipping into an inappropriate relationship.

Rebuilding Trust

Practical steps to rebuild trust include open communication, transparency, and professional counseling. The book offers detailed strategies to facilitate this challenging process.

Prevention Strategies

Glass provides guidelines for setting boundaries and maintaining healthy friendships to prevent emotional or sexual betrayals within a marriage.

Impact of Infidelity

The book discusses the emotional and psychological impact of infidelity on both partners, offering insights into the pain and mistrust that follows betrayal.

Top NOT "Just Friends" Quotes

  • 'Good people in good marriages are having affairs.'
  • 'You’re right to be cautious when you hear these words: “I’m telling you, we’re just friends.”'
  • 'Healing from infidelity is possible, but it requires commitment and hard work from both partners.'

Who should read NOT "Just Friends"?

This book is ideal for couples who have experienced infidelity and are seeking a way to rebuild their relationship. It is also beneficial for individuals looking to prevent infidelity by understanding its signs and implications. Therapists and counselors can use it as a resource to assist their clients in recovering from betrayal.

About the Author

Shirley Glass was a renowned psychologist and one of the world's leading experts on infidelity. With a career spanning over three decades, she contributed significantly to the understanding of extramarital relationships through research, therapy, and numerous publications. Her work has been instrumental in shaping current therapeutic practices related to infidelity.

NOT "Just Friends" Best Reviews

  • Dr. Glass provides a thorough exploration of infidelity, making it a must-read for anyone dealing with or aiming to prevent betrayal in their relationship. - The New York Times
  • 'NOT 'Just Friends'' is a groundbreaking book, offering realistic and actionable advice for couples navigating the aftermath of infidelity. - Psychology Today
  • Shirley Glass's insights are both profound and practical, providing a lifeline for couples who want to heal from betrayal. - Marriage and Family Therapy Review

NOT "Just Friends" FAQs

What is the main focus of 'NOT 'Just Friends''?

The book focuses on understanding, preventing, and healing from infidelity. It provides practical advice for recognizing red flags, rebuilding trust, and maintaining healthy boundaries in relationships.

Can emotional affairs be as damaging as physical ones?

Yes, Shirley Glass emphasizes that emotional affairs can be just as damaging as physical ones, as they often involve significant emotional connections that can threaten a marriage.

What steps does the book suggest for rebuilding trust after infidelity?

The book suggests steps such as open communication, transparency, and seeking professional counseling. It emphasizes the importance of consistent honesty and effort from both partners in the healing process.